hi everyone!!!
hope your doing good! I decided to write a new blog after emailing one of my client i work with ....I just started to train her online and she is truly beautiful and she wants to get her body to another level. So i told her i would definitely help her out.... But, after a few emails here and there, i realize that she is constantly looking at what she don't like on her body instead of what she likes. I keep telling her to Believe in herself and loving herself...and she will get what she wants. But i can truly relate to her and this is why i decided to write that blog. She ask me how i got started in the industry and how i got where i am today... so i figured i would share this with you :)
First of all, i always had a low self esteem about my body. Yes, this is gonna surprise a few of you , but i have nothing to hide and there is alot of woman who are in the same boat i was. For some reason i never liked my body. I was never over weight, in fact i suffered from anorexia at some point in my life. I was a track and field sprinter, a champion. And my coach destroyed me mentally... He kept saying i was too fat, that my legs were to big, that i couldn't lift them, couldn't run fast enough( which is not true...) It hurt me mentally and killed the very little confidence i had in me. That' s when i became anorexic.I was running 4-5 times a day, after every meal,i was eating carrots and would go for a 20 mile run. Until my mom told me i had severe problems and she would take me to see the psychiatrist !!! I was so scared, i went back to eating normal again! But, since that day i always battled with body images issues.
I started to workout at the gym, after 2 knee surgery and was amazed on how a body could change by doing weights. So i did it more and more! That's when i started to get an interest for fitness, figure, nutrition. I was looking at Oxygen magazine, Fitness RX and was DREAMING to get on stage and dreaming on being on the cover....
I always thought i was never good enough for the stage. i was shy, uncomfortable in my own body, i always wanted to be in someone else shoes, except mine.
But i went for it. To take away the fear, do something for myself and it was a new challenge for me.
i won the overall and it all started from there.......
Competing was actually the best thing i have ever done for myself. It gave me confidence, i was alive on stage and i discovered a "new me". I was loving everything about it! i was feeling powerful and people started to email me , i started to build a fan base and they were actually complimenting me on my body .....
This cant' be true... not my body. I was having a hard time to say thank you and just accepting the compliment. It's still something i fight for everyday of my life. Accepting. Accepting that your husband or fans, tells me: your beautiful, i love your body.... i still see the negative sometimes when people compliments me. BUT i have learn ALOT and grown and i am proud to be the woman i am today , that's for sure!!!
The fitness modelling part came after a year of competing.... i did one or 2 shoot here and there and nothing good came out of it. But again, i had that same feeling of being alive in front of the camera. I was confident, i felt sexy and beautiful and i wanted to pursue that feeling! so i kept shooting:)
Robert kennedy actually gave me my first spread in Oxygen with Robert Reiff ( photographer) and i always say to Robert K: thank you. You believed in me and gave me the chance to prove i could do this. And i did it. From there, i started to be more and more comfortable in front of the lens... i realized by myself that... maybe if i try hard enough, i could be good at this and..who knows where it can take me!
I wanted this SO BAD..... i remember walking to work one day and saying to myself: i will be recognize has a top fitness model, i am on every cover , i will do this , i can do this! And i will!
This particular moment( i have goose bumps!!) I meant e-v-e-r-y s-i-n-g-l-e word and i knew in my heart and mind that it was going to happen.
and somehow, it happened. I did it myself, without the help of anybody, i went to chase my dreams and nobody would stop me.
Don't get me wrong, i am a human being just like everybody else. I have days where i would love to be taller, be skinnier, ect... But by loving yourself and believing in yourself, you attract good people around you that are there to help you and love you . I have learn this over the years, and i am still learning to do this.
People think your born a model and you wake up one day and... your one the cover of magazines. That's why i decided to share this with you because i am NOT one of them. I made it happen by believing, working hard at it and yes it was a bumpy road for me to get there. But now, nothing can get in my way. When i want something, i definitely know how to get it!
Whatever your goal or dream is, you will meet people that don't think you can do it. Screw them. don't let anyone stop you from chasing your dreams or wanting something really bad. Do it for yourself. don't do it for anybody else...
I know alot of you takes me has an inspiration.... and i am so happy to be on your " wall of inspiration". Just remember that success dosent happen over night . You have to work at it, jump the hurdles, push people in your way that are stopping you to go further in life. And, if one door opens, 10 might be closed on the other side. LIFE is all about challenges, challenging YOURSELF. It takes faith, determination and dedication. And most important, learn to love yourself. Nothing good is gonna happen if you don't accept who you are has a person.
When you need something to believe in, start with yourself.”
Keep your dreams alive,
michele xox
